12 Solid One-Liners for St. Patrick’s Day

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You’ll wish you thought of these.

1. Thou shalt take more pitchers than selfies:

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(Look Human)

 2. This one is for the fun-sized crowd.

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(Skreened)

3.  Best group shot. Ever.

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(Ebay)

 4. But nothing else really says “I love you” like a coordinated St. Patrick’s Day shirt with your significant other.

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(Zazzle)

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(Zazzle) 

5. Points for theme and slurred speech. We’re about it.

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(Look Human)

6. Another occasion for someone to whip out the basic Risky Business get-up. Are you up for some whiskey business?

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(Urban Outfitters, sold out)

7. For all of the Taylor Swift fans out there–you’ll probably be shaking it off through the entire parade.

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(Urban Outfitters, sold out)

 8. At least if you’re stumbling, you’re making an attempt to be civilized?

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(Skreened)

9. Or you can just be straight-up ratchet.

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(Skreened)

10. Like really ratchet.

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(Amazon)

11. This one could be particularly interesting, especially if you’re definitely not Irish…

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 (Skreened)

12. Just be ready to sing this song all day. For extra points, carry a cereal box of Lucky Charms and take it with you wherever you go.

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(Etsy)

 Now pick your one-liner, scrawl it on a green T shirt, and you’re good to go for Newport’s St. Patrick’s Day Parade!