How To Destroy A Star Wars Fanatic’s Will To Live

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The previews for Episode VII have given fans hope…and this will dash it.

The two teaser previews for Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens have given us hope that the disaster of the prequels are behind us. We have been given a glimpse back into a universe we spent our childhoods pretending to live in, instead of a CGI embarrassment.

But some genius decided to remind us of what could have been(if Lucas hadn’t sold to Disney) and what might still be (just because a teaser gives our spine tingles doesn’t mean the rest of the movie will).

JJ Abrams has made jokes about killing Jar Jar Binks

“I have a thought about putting Jar Jar Binks’s bones in the desert there. I’m serious! Only three people will notice, but they’ll love it.”

That’s the kind of quote that makes us a tad nervous, because it displays an incredible ignorance about how the Internet interacts with anything Star Wars. One person might have caught it on the first showing, but within an hour, twenty million would know about it.

Regardless, we have been given a reminder of what the new trilogy could have been, had it been put together the same way as the prequels were. The Binks Awakens is truly terrifying.

-Tristan Pinnock, Blast Film Correspondent

Tristan’s just this guy, ya know?