Ladies, Don’t Date Guys Without Facebook

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Avoidance of social media is a great indicator of a criminal past…and a violent future.

There is pretty much only one reason why someone doesn’t have a Facebook account today and that’s because they have something to hide. They’re either hiding from people in their past or they’re hiding their past from people now, but one should consider not having a Facebook account to be an act of concealment.



When you look into as much local crime as we do, you pick up on certain trends and one of those trends is that serious criminals don’t have Facebook accounts. It’s as if there are two systems (or two sides of the same spectrum). One is run by Mr. Zuckerberg. The second (in Rhode Island) is run by A.T. Wall, Director of the Department of Corrections. The more involved someone is in the legal system, the less use they have for social tools.

The second reason that not having a Facebook profile is such a red flag is that it means that the guy isn’t smart enough to have created a fake profile. If a guy isn’t as smart as your typical Facebook spammer, should you really date him?

Case Study: Timothy Haslam

We searched high and low, but couldn’t find a Facebook profile for Timothy Logan Haslam. He is, by the look of this Patch article, a horrible person.

A Portsmouth man is facing rape, kidnapping and related charges for allegedly grabbing a woman from the Easton’s Beach parking lot and holding her against her will for six days last week while he repeatedly sexually assaulted her.

Timothy Logan Haslam, 57, of 2 North Drive, Portsmouth, is facing charges from both Newport and Portsmouth police in connection with the alleged crimes that came to an end when the victim escaped from a Seekonk hotel on Friday and told police that her ex-boyfriend had kidnapped her.

He’s also the kind of guy who gets himself arrested twice in the same day for breaking into the same house.

In Conclusion…

Now, we’re not saying that people should be straight up arrested for not using Facebook. We’re not saying that anyone without a Facebook page is a probably a serial killer. (Others do that.) We’re just saying that if you’ve just met a guy and he doesn’t have Facebook, keep your eyes wide open.

-Tristan Pinnock, Blast Dating Correspondent


Tristan’s just this guy, ya know?