Oh ****! Tom Brady The Subject Of ****ing FCC Complaints

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Strangely enough, none of the ****ing people filing ****ing complaints live in ****ing New England.

We don’t know if ****ing California native Tom ****ing Brady had much of a potty-mouth before he came to New England or if he’s spent enough time around ****ing Boston to realize that the ****ing F-bomb is a ****ing comma or if ****ing Belichick sat him down at some point and had him watch Boondock Saints or study this ****ing film:

The ****ing point is that Tom Brady has had a long, well-documented and ****ing established relationship with the F-word. He uses it when he’s ****ing happy…

Tom Brady Happy

He uses it when he’s ****ing sad…

Tob Brady Fuck me

He uses it when he’s ****ing irritated…

TOM-BRADY-FUCK-YOU-BITCHES

 

He uses it when he’s ****ing mad…

tom-brady-yelling-fuck-during-green-bay-gam

 

Now unlike some other ****ing dumb jock football players, Brady has a ****ing versatile vocabulary and can use it, even when he’s ****ing excited.

Tom Brady No Shit

 

See? No relying on the F-bomb there.

The Smoking Gun reports that a Colts fan, an Eagles fan and a (Whatever ****ing Team Iowans Support) fan took the time to register complaints with the FCC about the words they ****ing assume are coming out of Tom Brady’s mouth.

In one complaint, an Indianapolis parent wrote that their “6 year old children know how to read lips even if there is no sound.” The viewer wondered why CBS twice went out of its way to“show Tom Brady screaming the F word on national TV.”

A Pennsylvania grandparent reported that, “My 8 year old grandson was watching the game with me and even commented that he should not have said that.” The complainant added, “I understand the first time it happened that the camera man would not have expected that but to keep the camera on Tom Brady as he kept yelling was uncalled for.”

An Iowa resident criticized CBS broadcasters who “called attention to it by prefacing the clip they showed with, ‘Brady’s reaction after failing to pick up a first down on that series.’”  The complainant noted, “They clearly knew he was saying it and so did my 10 year old son…It was almost as if the announcers got away with it, because they didn’t actually say it. Very unprofessional.”

It’s interesting to note that the ****ing Green Bay-New England game was the highest rating regular season NFL game since ****ing 2007, drawing an audience of 30.9 million ****ing people. This means that 1 in 10,000,000 viewers took the time to ****ing complain to the FCC about how their ****ing grandkids can lip-read Tom Brady.

What’s truly ****ing disturbing is that these ****ing people obviously have been following the latest ****ing research that has determined that swearing is good for you. Even if they are ****ing ignorant to the ****ing facts, they are still making a ****ing assault on the health of one of the finest ****ing quarterbacks ever to play the game of ****ing football.

Perhaps someone can create a ****ing filter that shows a less-offensive NFL-related image whenever Brady starts dropping ****ing F-bombs like a B-52. Let us suggest Ray Rice in an elevator. Maybe footage from the upcoming Aaron Hernandez trial. Alternatively, perhaps these grandparents would like to explain to their grandchildren what chronic traumatic encephalopathy is and why they encourage an activity that causes it. Alternatively, the Patriots could just have a guy stand in between Brady and the camera when his inner sailor bursts out…

Tom Brady Shit

Don’t get us wrong, we love the sport. We just think that if someone thinks that a few bad words being mouthed on TV is an aspect of the NFL that needs to be complained about through official channels, then they might want to reevaluate their priorities if they actually want to give their grandchildren a better world to live in when they’re older.

-Tristan Pinnock, Blast French Correspondent

Tristan’s just this guy, ya know?