Autumn In Newport Drinking Game (Updated for 2015)

Fall is when things start to slow down in Newport. Let’s make it more interesting.

1. Someone is drinking a Pumpkin Latte – 1 drink

2. Someone rocks yoga pants – 1 drink.
(It’s a guy – 4)

3. Someone is offered a sugar spice rim for their pumpkin beer – 1 drink
(They accept – 2)

4. The word “fantasy” is used not referencing something sexual or/or D&D/Game of Thrones-y. – 2 drinks

5. The beer someone is drinking at Oktoberfest isn’t German. – 1 drink (Be careful, this one will add up fast) So long Newport Yachting Center.

6. A girl describes her Halloween costume as “slutty” – 2 drinks

7. Patriots lose – Finish your drink. Go home.

8. Patriots win – Finish your drink. Get another drink.

9. Someone complains about their hours/shifts getting cut – 1 drink

10. Someone talks about the January vacation they booked somewhere warm – 2 drinks

11. Someone who’s complaining about their hours getting cut mentions the January vacation they just booked to somewhere warm – 5 drinks

12. Someone mentions that they hate candy corn – 1 drink
(They eat some anyway – 3 drinks)

13. You hear the words “Pumpkin Spice” – 1 drink

14. Someone forgets their umbrella because it was raining when they came into the bar…and then it’s stopped – 2 drinks

15. Someone at your bar dresses up like someone else at your bar for Halloween – 4 drinks

16. Someone tells you Thanksgiving Eve will be “the biggest bar night of the year” – 1 drink
(It isn’t – 2 drinks)
(It is – 4 drinks)

17. The mention of “having to do homework” destroys someone’s game – 3 drinks

18. Someone explains why they’re backing whichever (non-Red Sox) baseball team in the playoffs – 2 drinks

19. You find someone more attractive in their fall attire than when they were half-naked this summer – 2 drinks

20. Someone says “I’m not against gambling but…” – 3 drinks This is going to be a lot rarer this year, so make it 5

AND FINALLY…

Someone says “I guess the season’s really over…” – Order a bottle of Jack Daniels and…

–Tristan Pinnock, Blast Drinking Correspondent