Tourists, Here’s The #1 Spot In Newport To Get Your Brawl Videotaped

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We’re not saying you can’t fight there. We’re just saying there’s going to be video evidence…and cops.

If there’s one irritation in Newport, especially in the summer, it’s the people who roll into town and decide to get into a fight. A lot of the time, it’s people who think that because they’re in a new town where no one knows them, they can get away with being a tough guy, which always works out well when they decide to start with a local (and what turns out to be 20 of his friends). Other times, people are drinking too much and sharing a bit of domestic violence with the rest of the city.

If you’re a tourist and want to get on Youtube for fighting (and arrested a few seconds later), there’s one spot you want to head to after 1am and that’s 372 Thames St, AKA Via Via. Now, a whole load of drunks in one place after the bars close is a great recipe for hooking up, cat fights, the rare brawl and the occasional domestic like the Patch reported that we had last week:

NEWPORT, RI — Tara [REDACTED] was charged Thursday at 12:15 a.m. with Domestic Simple Assault and Battery; Domestic Disorderly Conduct; and Disorderly Conduct. According to the police report, she and her boyfriend had gone out to dinner to celebrate his birthday. They were walking down Thames Street when they argued. Bystanders got into it and reported she was yelling at him and slapped him in the face in front of Via Via.

[First, to address the elephant in the room…a whole town named Pelham? Is it a whole community of smokeshow bartenders? Do they have Stu-esday too? So many questions…]

Some of the onlookers started videotaping her. She allegedly slapped three of them. However, the cell phone battery ran out, so the video was not available to review at that moment.

Police said the people videotaping did not want to press charges. The boyfriend acknowledged they had argued but said nothing physical happened. The woman said only that the “millennials” had given her trouble, and she felt they invaded her privacy by videotaping.

That’s right. We’ve got a woman who assaulted three people she’s calling “millennials” for “invading her privacy” on a public street. You know, privacy? That’s where she can beat the crap out of whoever without the cops showing up and stopping her.

Now, you can’t hit people for filming you when you’re beating up a guy in front of Via Via for the same reason that Floyd Mayweather doesn’t hit the cameramen at the MGM Grand: That’s what they’re there for.

While you may look around and see this…


A post shared by Fuck Yeah Rhode Island (@fyeahri) on

…experienced Newporters, know that at any moment it can turn into:

Boxing Ring

This is why they have their smartphone cameras at the ready.

Of course, on any busy night, there’s probably four Newport Police officers sitting across the street at The Armory, keeping an eye on things, so the response time is as long as it takes them to exchange glances, roll their eyes and stroll across Thames.

This seems to have cut down on most of the shoving matches.

[Locals, you know where residents go to fight: Up Broadway in front of the police station.]

-Tristan Pinnock, Blast Brawl Correspondent

Tristan's just this guy, ya know?